Thursday, December 6, 2012


-- sorry I didn't have time to proof!
I am not trying to avoid putting my feelings out there, I promise.  I know that you missed it sooo much!  Angela kept telling me so -- sorry...girl, you can get back to your regular lunches now. :)

Let me see where to begin.

I am working out...aka Crossfitting. ...Let me backtrack here.

I have a couple of friends...Keith and Joan, who have been following this mess of a journey that I am on..I shouldn't say mess.  It was a mess.  It's getting corrected, as we you read.  Sorry.   They contacted me after seeing me struggle with losing anything.   Joan messaged me and said....Keith can help you.  People, when I see those words, I think 'great another shake, pills, great yet another gimmick.'  (flash back to 2011, where I think I tried everything from Weightwatchers to juice fasts.)  NOW...I finally got the courage and called them up and went down to the office.

NOW, let me say this....It took me about 2-hours of travel time to get there.  Its at an office in Berrian Springs, MI, called Healing Springs  .  (beautiful town)  Awesome people, professional, caring, and they are learning about Crossfit.  HA!  It's a different kind of experience.  I found out that my lymph nodes weren't working, which by-the-way in my research, its a pretty important part of the system!  My thyroid through testing is hypo -- which hello, explains a lot!  Other things that have since been corrected.   I left with having to take 3-bottles of vitamins, minerals, enzymes and things to help with kidney function, and cleaning house!  Diet changed to eating some dairy and grains. 

Now, I really didn't think nothing of it but I learned that my eating I have issues with.....I worked out a little here and there.  Had the idea is my body going to heal, if in my Crossfit workouts my body is trying to heal from that as well....  UHM>......SHOOOT!!!!!  Keith told me to cut back to 3-days per week and include walking.  Makes sense, really.

On my second, visit I found that I lost only 1 lbs -- 4 weeks...1 lbs...I think less than that...I just was like..literally, saying out loud -- ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?  No inches...just so  you know.

Keith checked my neck, as I was telling him I was dizzy with the breathing exercises....I got talked into being adjusted with Dr. Andersen...I will say this...awesome. My shoulder issue, do you remember that!?  It was some little muscle pulling on this, that, and the other thing.  Really.  I don't know, what its called.  I was just happy.  HAPPY, HAPPY   He used this lovely machine and worked on it, then he worked on my traps. I was a lot of fun I am sure!  Dr. Andersen...welcome to the world of dealing a Crossfitter!  (I know he had a workout!)  Then..I learned that my lower lymph nodes have been cleared (yay,) still working on these lovely breathing exercises to help with some upper ones.  Pray on that.  Keith wants to get my lymph nodes working, as they are the one's that help the body release toxins -- hello, fat is toxins!  I need to get it working so that when my thyroid is being worked on next, it carries it all out.  Then, I hear that my upper lymph nodes aren't clearing, then he says he needs to call a Dr for consult.  *sigh*  NOW, I am a VERY emotional person, my brain is not optimistic, all the time, just half.  (hush, its my blog, lol)  I lost it, tears, the worse things in the world were going through my head...ready...

  • OMG...I am dying!
  • Crap...what if it's cancer.....
  • You idiot, why did you let things go so bad!?
  • Are you a moron, you won't heal, this is stupid.
  • You have 4-babies sitting out in the waiting!?
I was texting my husband when Joan walked by with Elise, seen that I was tearing up came in and hugged me ...then Keith.  I was really trying not to let the tears be shown....I was a blubbering baby. 39-years old crying.   People there will be voices that get into your head at weak points of your life and you need to check them QUICK.  Do not listen to those voices...they are called demons...evil, stupid, and cruel demons.  They don't want you to succeed.  Keith fixed that quick like, with some words of wisdom -- of course!  I was a little better. 

After the conversation, with the consult.  Keith told me no dairy, no grains, and no giving up.  I laughed out loud...So..I LOL'd.  So I am going back to the Paleo way of eating.  Yep.  I am.  I am also taking 2-more pills!  Did you know...I am popping 26-pills a day!!??  26 -- 1 is an enzyme that is strong...very strong.  -- remember this is only temporary!!!  So that is good news right!?  Geez, I don't know.I am giggling nervously here.

So, there you have where I am at right now.  Do you see why I have been so hush, hush?  I am trying to be mindful of what I am eating, because we all know that a woman stressed, pms'ing, who is overcoming a lot is a very bad thing.  I will say so much as changed on my body though.....Do I dare say....I feel clearer minded...a bit more energetic.  Although after the workout yesterday I was ready for a nap.  40 burpees, 10 deadlifts at 175 lbs in ten minutes will do that to someone.....someone who is working on getting a lot of garbage out of their head and body.

I never thought I would say this, but my body was a MESS.  I say was...because I am working on more positive ways of thinking.  I was in a dark spot.....a woe is me spot.  I had so much going on in life and I swear I won't go back there.  I can't afford to.  I am learning that I have so many people in my corner and I need to grasp that.  I need to see the positives vs the negative things.  I need to know that not everyone rejects me.  (more on that at another time.)  People are out there who care and won't mock you.  We are met for more things than this...really.  I promise.

We surely are what we think aren't we?  I still see visions of me being lean and strong.  I still want to be a Crossfit coach..all in due time.  It will happen.  

It felt good to get all that off my chest!  :)  Did you miss me?  I know that you did. 

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